Piglet sidled up to Pooh from behind. "Pooh!" he whispered.
"Yes, Piglet?" "Nothing," said Piglet, taking Pooh's paw.
"I just wanted to be sure of you." ~A.A. Milne
What is a friend? I think most of us would like to think it is someone you can count on. Someone that will never let you down, never take advantage of you, and someone who will always be there for you.
But is that realistic? Many friends come and go. Rare are the friends that truly stay around forever. Even those friends come and go like the tide. Sometimes they are more prevalent in your life, and sometimes you don't see or talk to them for a long time, but you know they are still there.
I would have to say my best friend is Jenny. We have been friends since 25 years. We met when we worked together at Children's Palace in Burnsville. She was coming in with her little sister to pick out a Cabbage Patch Doll. I already worked at the Palace and I think I was yelling at customers, because in the Cabbage Patch craze you could yell at the customers and on one cared. Jenny ended up applying for a job, and getting it, even though she lied about her age. I am 5 years older than Jenny. That has never been a problem for us, although it worked more to her advantage than mine. I had the ID that was needed to buy all that peach schnapps.
I talked to Jenny a couple of weeks ago. Before that we hadn't talked in quite a while, a few months, I think. But that is OK. When the going gets tough, we are there for each other. Or when a new Sex and the City movie comes out, we are definitely going to see it together, probably on the day it comes out. When her first husband died, she called me and I didn't say I was going to her house, but I think she knew I was. I am the Godmother to her 2 boys. She is Charlie's godmother. It is hard to imagine us not being friends. But is it possible? Sure, I guess.
People marry people, have kids together, go on lavish vacations, go through life and death with their spouse and then they get divorced. On the wedding day that doesn't seem possible, and yet it happens, about 50% of the time.
Some people have problems with their families. They don't get along, someone does something, usually involving money, and they don't speak anymore. Estranged.
I'm not sure where I'm going with this post. I have had some friend problems recently. I've been hurt very badly, and no apologies have been issued. A different issue involves something I've done for a friend for a long time, but I really don't want to do it anymore. It is just assumed that I will do it when she needs it done. How do I say, after all these years, No? Are we obligated to do things for our friends even if we don't want to?
I feel like I am a good friend. Maybe too good. Maybe I have SUCKER written all over my forehead, to the point that I sometimes get taken advantage of.
When does a friendship become more trouble than its worth? Does time heal all wounds? Is it ok to say no to a friend? And if they get mad at you were you really friends?
Is there an answer to "What is friendship?"
